I can't help myself,,,

I may be getting ahead of myself, as is very much true to my nature...how can I explain that I am someone who is more afraid *not* to take a chance, more afraid that I will one day look back and regret what I *didn't* take a chance on...

Coincidences abound. He spent 3 weeks in Portland a while back. Mentioned some favorite restaurants...all three were favorites of mine, not just ones I'd been to, but absolute favorites. He really likes Portland, wants to go back.

We agree on college football, other sports, foods, music...he is reluctant to discuss politics or religion at this point, doesn't want to "cause dissension". I doubt that will happen.

To hear that he finds nothing more attractive than a redhead with short hair? Wow. To hear that he thinks I'm sexy, that I have a "perfect" figure, I have beautiful eyes, etc. More wow. To be told, numerous times a day, that he's thinking about me...I eat it up. It's exactly what I want to experience. What I want, need, dreamed of.

I think there is an element of "timing" going on here. I can't explain it. But if certain things had worked out differently, for either of us, this would not be happening right now, between us. I am one to find significance in that.

He is open, honest, gentle, yet passionate, sensitive, strong, masculine...this is almost too good for me to believe, like I'm going to find out tomorrow that there was some mistake...that he's changed his mind about me. But, I just don't really think that is likely. Maybe he will find out something about me, eventually, that is too much for him. It has happened before, more than once. In fact, it's what I have come to expect. I'm too emotional, I'm too intense, I move too fast...but, I want to be accepted for me. And I want to give my whole heart. With it comes a lot of love, passion, care, etc. OK, I know I'm far from perfect. Who is perfect? Not one single person I've ever met, not even the ones I've admired the most. It's not a matter of being perfect, and it's not a matter of finding someone perfect. It's a matter of finding yourself willing to give and receive, and finding someone else willing to give and receive, and finding the compatibilities that make it possible to work out. That's why I think I should be very hopeful...so far, all of those elements seem to be in place.

Please, don't warn me or discourage me. If it doesn't work out, I will be OK. But, I can't help but be excited and want this to be the right thing for me. I've needed something good, and this is feeling so good...wish me well.